oldiesman

You guys remember "One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest"? There's a segment where Randall P. McMurphy is talking to his fellow mental prisoners and asking who is committed? Turns out there were very few of them committed. Randall P. was committed though, but most of them were in the nuthouse voluntarily. "all you do is complain and complain and complain about this place, and then you don't have the guts to just walk out"? Come on man, what's up. And so some folks in twi are told they are prisoners. From this website. They are prisoners, but you don't tell them to walk out of their prison? How are YOU really helping them? By telling them how f-up twi is? Those who are IN and MISERABLE already know that. And so you complain, you coddle their misery. You incubate their pain, but you don't relieve it. Are you really helping them leave? Think about it. You say they are prisoners, but you give them no incentive or encouragement to leave their prison? Of course it's not easy. It's a damn hard choice! And telling twi to give them money, or change, or help them leave, it like expecting a turtle to be a cheetah. It ain't gonna happen.

Forget about twi leadership and what they think. When I was in twi and the times I was miserable because of it, I didn't care what leadership thought and didn't hang around and complain, I left. Don't listen to people who don't give a fig about you.Yes it meant doing things alone and not going to their fellowships anymore, and distruption of your life. It may mean losing your job. It may mean losing your spouse, although for some that might be a good thing. It may mean losing contact with your children. A very tough decision, but no more than a miserable marriage that breaks up. Misery may cause ulcers, what good are you to your children when you have them? It can be a hard decision, but I maintain that if you are miserable in twi, you owe it to yourself to get up and leave. God doesn't want you to be miserable. Your children will understand your decision some day if they can't now. I like the idea of the tough love concept. It toughens you up. Sort of makes you think your life through, and shows you how to decide one way or the other what you want to do with your life. Puts you in control. Sometimes the answer to a problem is just to take the damn medicine instead of rationalizing this and rationalizing that. I know its harsh, but we're in the big leagues now. And there are folks who will help you if you need it! Take a check up from the neck up... You who are miserable, rise up and make your life better. You can do it! You CAN leave The Way!

Remember the old saying we were taught in twi, it went something like: "lead, follow, or get out of the way?" It's pretty harsh, tough medicine but gets the point across. Stop complaining. No excuses. If ya don't like it, leave. Of course it's difficult and shocking to leave twi! We all went thru it here, right? So why should I expect anything less from those who are miserable there? Well I don't! There are folks who will help you, if you tired of it and want to leave. Come on, be strong, you won't regret it!

David whatever it is please spill the beans, I wanna try it. I'm spending too much money on gas and it ain't getting any cheaper.

You're welcome Sharon! I prefer to keep all that on mine.

Hi Sharon, It's quite simple once you get the knack for it. Here are the steps: 1) -- go to www.smileycentral.com and click the blue circle to get free smileys. It will then create a smiley icon on your browser bar that will give you access to all the smileys. 2) -- when the smiley icon is on your browser bar, click it and as you see there will be multiple categories of smileys to choose from. Choose one, then right click on it and choose "copy smiley HTML" 3) -- next, go back on GS Cafe and when you're ready to reply to a post, click reply, then you will see a bar at the top and one of the choices will be "Display Image UBB-CODE". 4) -- Click that and you will see a box there to paste your image URL from smiley central. 5) -- click ok, then when the url is displayed, just take out the two [/url]

moddishwasher RULES

Oh Chas, ya didn't have to.

Why thank you, Sharon!

Hey that sounds pretty good. Can't complain about that.So why are the miserable folks staying in twi? Just my two cents worth, but I think they should be honest with themselves and with their spouses or whoever, and just leave. "To Thine Own Self Be True"

Hitler built the Autobahns too.

Belle, that makes sense. They wouldn't know how happy you are since they don't talk to you. But, not everyone who has left is much more blessed than they ever dreamed possible in twi. That's an assumption on your part.And similar to THEM not speaking to YOU, you and I don't know how happy or unhappy someone in twi is, unless you or I talk directly to THEM. I will accept your statements that you're much happier now than you ever dreamed you were in twi, and am thankful for that. I don't think twi was ever for you. However, I will not accept that folks in twi I never met are unhappy, miserable, or share your views. Maybe they do, maybe they don't; I have no way of knowing unless I talk to them.

This is true. The judge himself said that a jury should decide the merits of the allegations. Let me repeat: the judge said a jury should decide the allegations. I feel comfortable that the judge is correct, that after hearing all the facts under oath, the jury decides. That's the proper way to judge a case.And so I think it's just rumor, hearsay and innuendo to you and me. Unless you have firsthand knowledge of what happened, you really don't know what happened. Neither do I. So I refrain from being supportive of the allegations, especially from folks who might have a pre-determined mindset and unbalanced perspective against everything that is twi. As Johniam mentioned earlier, I am not unsympathetic to those who have been abused. It has happened in twi. I just wish in this case there would have been a trial so that all the facts would've been exposed for a jury, and subsequently us, to make an informed decision based on all the exposed facts. That didn't happen. Also the thought crossed my mind that a trial might have brought down Riverbark too. I guess that wasn't in the plans. Oh well.

Defeatist attitude, HCW.

Am I? Ok. Whatever. ChasUFarley, do you know what an allegation is?From Merriam Webster's Tenth Collegiate Dictionary, an allegation is: 1) the act of alleging; 2) a positive assertion, specif: a statement by a party to a legal action of what the party undertakes to prove; 3) an assertion unsupported and by implication regarded as unsupportable. In short, an allegation is not proof. That's why we go to court, to prove allegations. And so when you say that Ms. Allen was raped, you are believing their allegation, which is to be viewed as unsupportable because it was never proven in court. Too bad too. They had a possibility of doing so. You can believe what you want, its your head.

David, I bet it's got something to do with Randi Dandy.

ChasUFarley, what violent crime? Geeze, and they think I'M on drugs. The Allens had the perfect opportunity to get all the facts out in the open, under oath, in open court, but since they didn't and chose da money instead, we'll never really know if she got raped, now would we? But as far as I understand the facts, she was sexually harassed. She could have opened the door, and left. There were no allegations of physical restraint. That's different from rape. But I would have loved to read the testimony, wouldn't you have?

cool dats mine control

I totally agree Johniam. And thx for the support.

ChasUFarley, don't you read? I didn't call anybody helpless mindless victims, in fact I believe the opposite. I believe adults like Fern All*n were not helpless mindless victims. And by the way, she sure made out well in the end, doncha think?

That's why I try to treat participants in twi-2 as responsible adults who can make decisions on their own. I think treating them like infantile helpless mindless victims doesn't do any good. Treat every decent person with respect and there's a good chance you'll receive back the same consideration. Me too Jonny. Thx for your comments.

Yeah dmiller, that makes sense. No Cool, I never heard of mine control. If any miners disagree, feel free to opine. Me too, HCW. However, I'd like to amend my previous dissent and say that there possibly were and are some folks who made decisions to stay in TWI because of fear.