Twinky

The no debt policy kept me out of home ownership for years...that was after they'd thrown me out. I was so concerned about no debt/no mortgage that I never bought when I could have done. Property prices rose considerably. Finally I got a job with lotsa money and moved to a new (expensive) city. Bought a house...property market collapsed three months later. As it happens, I have a lot of money in the house and the interest payments on the mortgage are much cheaper than rent would be if I were renting. Otherwise...move on when it suited. Sure it's easier to move to rented acommodation to suit your family's /household's needs, but no telling what sort of property you'll get, what condition it'll be in, and the previous renters may not have been the cleanest, neatest, careful tenants. Yeah, right, good for stability. For building up your home fellowship. When you might move to another part of the city at the drop of a hat. For kids' schooling, maybe having to move schools. What would the bl00dy trustees know about frequent moving and the disruption caused? How often did they move? Did they swap houses? [no, only mates, but that's another thread! ] Those who have been in rez will remember that every few months we had to completely clean our rooms out, then wait for a new room assignment. That might be with people we already knew well, had been roomies with before;..and might even be in the room we'd just moved out of. To teach us to "travel light" and to get on with different sorts of people. Yeah...we all wanted to be nomads, didn't we?

Whitewash...

What's changed? Life got wonderful. I got my life back... Oh, you meant, what changed for them? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Nothing changes there unless for the worst.

Being as the title of this thread is "Bologna Sandwiches & Tea" (polony, yeuk; a cross between sandwich meat and salami, double yeuk) - it's the "and tea" part I'm picking up on. Because most Americans don't drink "tea" though they may drink herbal infusions. As a Brit - I love my tea. I drink gallons of it. Truly. Somehow or other, during all my years in rez, I never ran out of tea, proper ("black") tea. It was hard to come by sometimes, but friends, visitors, spiritual partners...just gave boxes of tea bags to me. Twas not till I was preparing to leave and fly back home and GIVING AWAY my tea bags, that I realised how very blessed I'd been to have so much tea available to me. And on that note, I'll go and make myself another pot of tea. Teapot holds about 2 pints. This will be about my 6th potful today.

Broken Arrow, I'm sorry for your loss of your father. And for your difficulties in coming to terms with your grief. It's okay to grieve. My father died (also heart disease) at age 50 (decades ago now) - it was a sorrowful time. At least I had the comfort of knowing he was at peace and painless now, with God in heaven (as I then believed, being quite young). That's the peace you refer to. It doesn't stop us grieving or missing the deceased, but it does give us a reason to carry on living. While we are in this human body, sickness and death will come to us all. Doesn't matter what our goals are. Your dad's death wasn't his fault. Nor was it yours. Might be worthwhile getting regular heart/health checks yourself in case you have an inherited tendency to what he died from. "Believing" for a long life is as much about taking care of yourself now in purely physical things, as well as attitude to life. I love that OT description ... "old and full of days" - doesn't occur as often as I'd remembered, but it's a tender way of describing death. We all fell for VPW's line at least briefly. And it's mostly wrong. Some people do just give up when in a difficult situation, that they perceive as hopeless. And some spouses don't last long after their loved "other half" has died - their reason for living has gone. Very elderly people might set a goal - reach 100, see someone's marriage, see a new baby - and then, goal achieved, die soon after. But the will to survive is very strong; that doesn't happen to most people. For all we know, when VPW started spouting that line, he was already suffering from cancer and knew it was far gone and inoperable. That man abused his body in many ways and reaped the consequences. I wouldn't be at all surprised if he was already sowing the seeds of his own post-death glorification and in his usual manipulative way, was saying (again) how much he'd done for us by his (cough) stand on the word.

I never heard that tale before. I did hear the regular twig explanation (though when I first started attending twig - not in later years); it was given whilst holding a horn of plenty: "This little end represents what you put in, what you give to God; and this big end represents what he gives back to you." Struck me as a naff explanation then. What I did like about the horn of plenty is that you could put your hand in and drop your offering without it being on display for all to see (=giving in secret), but then, where I was, we never got tangled up in reporting how much people had given. I didn't ever send in any form reporting how much my twig members had given.

George...don't be so sexist! Much better role model!! Sista power heh heh

If she is (was?) such a gifted teacher, how come everyone reports SNS as being so very boring? And why isn't she teaching "how to teach" (and make it interesting) to the WC and other leadership? Because as well as being "gifted" there are also teaching techniques that can be learned by those less gifted.

@teachmevp: not meaning to be difficult, but is English your first language?

He has a look in his eye that suggests he will be lively, mischievous, full of energy and you will (you will!) get or keep very fit. He will make sure of that. Have fun!

They did the chicken thing when I was in too (at HQ). We were in pairs, one to hold the chicken's legs and the other to wield the ax to chop off its head while it was on a chopping block. Then we peeled the skin and feathers off, cut it open and removed any eggs, as Groucho said. I doubt my partner and I did more than 6 altogether, and perhaps only 3. What I thought (after getting over the horror of killing something like that) was all the colors inside the chicken, the way everything fitted together...and that's just a chicken. And I thought how we, as human beings, are fearfully and wonderfully made...not just in our innards, which are more interesting, no doubt, than a chicken's, but all of us. We got chicken for dinner too. And it certainly hasn't put me off eggs, of which I eat a vast quantity.

Yah, Cara, I'd rather use cash too, than a check, for the same reason. Not that fleecing people for their ABS was a biggie where I was. Just as a side issue: When I was a little girl attending Sunday School, we had little round plastic moneyboxes, modelled after an African hut. We used to collect the pennies from our pocket money, big old heavy pennies, they were too - and every so often take the moneybox along to church and it was emptied. At the time, the Biafran war was going on in Africa. The money collected in these African moneyboxes was sent to help dispossessed people in Biafra, we were told (though clearly not in those words, not to little kids). A couple of decades later, I was witnessed to by a young man whose family had come as refugees from that very area of Africa. Often wondered if this little girl's pennies went to help that young man and his family in their time of need.

Huge bowls of fruit salad for the evening meal...not everyone's choice of meal, but something I love. (And because lots of people didn't like it and left it, there was always had more than I could eat.) Very nice yoghurt on Corps Nights for sack suppers. And (very surprising to me) a 5-grain cereal kind of porridge that we had for breakfast at times. As I hate porridge, always have, I was really shocked to find that I liked this stuff and would gladly make it for myself to eat now, if I knew what was in it. There was also plenty to eat that was a little strange to my palate. Mayo with most everything...

Oh and I have some tomato plants too. They are huge and there is abundant fruit on them. I have never grown such enthusiastic tomatoes. Last year they seemed to get blight, or damped off. These have great big trusses. All green so far, nothing beginning to turn red. JJ, gardening is really therapeutic. Agree totally with you. I used to have a very stressful job...come back home, do a couple of hours in the garden, and the stress would dissipate like dew. Tending anything that grows can be very therapeutic.

To beer, or not to beer: that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler for a horse to suffer The saddles and reins of outrageous riders, Or to take arms against the seat of tyrants, And by opposing end them? (Okay Twinx. Leave it to Shakespeare.)

LOL, Ham, your cats sound funny. I've heard the effect of catnip on cats can be a bit like that of marijuana on humans. The little'uns can be mighty terrifyin' to the bigger ones... A couple of months ago, my mum got a rescue cat, Dinah, very small, 2kgs, kitten sized but apparently about 5 years old. Friendly cat but very thin and tiny. Slowly and pickily putting on weight. Mum came to visit me recently, so with some anxiety she took Dinah to my sister's. Sis has two very timid cats (only marginally less timid than my two). Dinah investigated my sis's house and her two cats did a runner. She ate all their food and pushed them out of their fave places. Sis's two sleep on her bed; Dinah also invited herself onto the bed. Dinah has sis's two firmly under her control. When she feels like it, Dinah also pushes sis's rather large dog out of its bed and curls up in the middle. The dog whimpers in the corner, but won't go near the dogbed. Now Dinah is back with Mum and seems to have found an appetite. No more pickiness; she chows down on anything, and in large quantity.

How lovely to have birds in the garden! I used to have some too, but have to scare them off now, if seen. Crypto my timid cat captured her first (baby) bird recently then came home with two mice (on two separate days). Mrs Blackbird is very wary but I don't want to encourage Crypto to catch birds. Easier to make the garden less attractive to them. After much effort my garden path is (partly) finished. The top part, at least, and some new steps. It looks nice but hardly worth all the effort it's taken. I have once huge 1/2 tonne bag of rubble left, and have disposed of the same amount at the tip. I have two sacks the same size of surplus soil which may be used later. This year I've hardly planted anything. I had some nice strawberries earlier. The autumn fruiting raspberries seem to have come in July and vanished (pigeons got there first, perhaps?). Last year's leeks are still in the ground, in flower, and I will collect the seed if any later. I have runner beans and there is enough for a small boiling; the plants aren't very leafy despite watering and Miracle-Gro over the past few weeks. My rhubarb is completely defunct. I do have self-setter potatoes which seem to be flourishing. Flowers have come and gone very quickly. Weeds haven't grown at all (that's nice). It has been a drought for the last 3 months, baking hot, too hot to be outside at all really, so pity the poor plants that couldn't grow. How any have survived is amazing. Have only cut the lawn x2 this year. Today has rained lightly all day. It will do the garden good. Probably be full of weeds tomorrow. I'd like to get some winter crops in - brassicas, maybe, if not too late. See what's on offer in the farmers' market, can get sturdy little plants ready for planting out. Ah. The joy of gardens....

Good post, Dot. We are to love others "as ourselves". But first we need to love ourselves! Only later comes laying down our lives for our friends. Being "living sacrifices" does not mean laying down our lives as doormats. We're to be harmless to others, and generous to them. Give to those in need. Not to those who come simply to steal, kill and destroy. AND>>> We are also commanded to be as wise (or wary) as serpents (or snakes). Tread firmly and confidently on the ground, and most snakes will disappear quietly into the undergrowth. From your perspective, perhaps treading firmly and confidently means saying "No!" or "That's enough," or "This is a loan; what arrangements for repayment can you make?" And meaning it. (Mind you, I don't claim to be an expert...still working out the balance for myself! :blush: )

Take it easy and slow, like Socks suggests. But I'd wanna know: >Do you feel loved there? Cared for? Valued? How does that feel...to you? >How do you know leadership cares? How does that feel? >Do you always feel slightly guilty for having done/not done something? Aw, come on, let's go and hang out with some disreputable folks...like Jesus did.

From the blog that George's link above takes you to. But see my links (above) that describe the work that is going on in this historic cemetery, which had fallen into disuse and overgrown-ness; and is now tended by a volunteer group/trust. The Arno's Vale trust doesn't mention the "Muller Foundation", either; and the Muller website doesn't mention tending his grave, nor even where he is buried. Mentions where other family members are buried, though.

Hi Beguiled. You have been ill-treated by TWI and have had a very disturbed life, in so many ways. It would be nice to think it was an isolated incident...but unfortunately, it's the pattern of how TWI screwed everyone over. You may find solace in realizing that it wasn't your family, or you, that was specifically targeted, but it's the modus operandi. You are not at fault. Your parents are not at fault. Your brother is not at fault. You are all victims. Now figure out what to do with yourself. How to live your life from now on. Yes - YOU can do that. Here, we've nearly all been through the same stuff. You will be sad, happy, angry, confused, elated, relieved, and lots of other emotions. Many share what has helped them. As the onion layers of deceit are stripped off, the tears of relief will flow. Welcome!

Not sure why there would be the "family tomb" in the curbed and raised tomb thing photo'd in the blog; and also a headstone as shown on the actual Arno's Vale Cemetery website. The remains can't be buried in two places. There's no evidence of any connection between the two; they don't seem to be adjacent. Hmm. Might investigate that some time. Slightly off topic, but it appears that Muller's work continues, but now in relation to the care of the elderly: The Work of Muller's There's an interesting bit about his life (and two wives) under teh Heritage tab.

You might find this link of interest. Scroll down to the bottom for a pic of Muller's graveSTONE, ie, not what's shown in the earlier link. Yes, the grave was perhaps neglected, but that's because the cemetery itself had become neglected. It's now a well-cared for location and a haven for wildlife because it is relatively undisturbed. Muller's gravestone

Welcome, Cara, nice to have you here. Shocking what you will learn. And with all you learn, surprising how free you will become. Waysider, I fancy that rhubarb pie too, is there another piece? Yum yum.

I don't think they're so much "alpha" males as laugh-a-males. Or laughable males. (Vomit icon anywhere?)