doojable

Blip! ROFLMAO! Blip!

At the break we will be handing out our "65th Anniversary Blinders" They are sure to bless your life and keep you on the narrow way...

The President' Theme Song Sung to the tune of "Peace Like a River" I need pieces of liver, Pieces of liver, Pieces of liver To make me whole... I need pieces of liver, Won't you deliver? Pieces of liver To make me whole... I'll put Joy in the fountain Joy in the fountain Joy in the fountain to make me whole... I'll put Joy in the fountain The bubbles! Count them! Joy in the fountain will make me whole... It doesn't matter It doesn't matter Whatever gets taught Will make me whole... It doesn't matter It's all just chatter As long as I'm in charge I'll be whole...

If Cleanliness IS Godliness - then by all means, let's purge out the vermin! Well.... all except for the favored vermin. You know, the vermin who have special privileges because they have money or talent (or both.) Make sure the Fox is guarding the chicks... er...chickens... Then make sure that fox has enough people around to cover (lie ;)) and tell everyone how grateful they should be for the opportunity to live in the coop... er.... Walls of Zion. As the mighty Rosie comes to the stage, all rise with respect and fall to their knees in deep devotion. "Thank-you Rosie, for giving us these walls of Zion that we may hide rest here. You are so wonderful!" "We love you, Rosie! You've given us a place to become clean and whole!" "Rosie is King!" Meanwhile, backstage.... Rosie's true and most loyal minions are milling about... they know they are safe because the Mighty Rosie will cover for them at all costs. They stand and sing, "Glory to Her Name." During the ceremony, an annoucement is made: "There will be chicken and lamb served at dinner tonight...Will the following people please report to the kitchen...) "Oh! and we need someone to please volunteer to repair the sheep's clothing... It seems some of it is wearing thin...)

Ladies and Gentlejerks, Open your "Sting Along the Ways" to #65 Standing on the Premises." That was wunnnerful! I stand before you, sitting behind you, about to tell you something which I know nothing about... And now, please be blessed by the musical mishandlings by the band. "Harry Snot and His Nine Nasty Nose-Pickers"... Plenty of seats... (You'll sit on the floor. ;)) Free admission... You'll pay at the door.

Songs: "How Long Has It Been?" "Goosestep Christian Soldiers"

It was a dark and stormy night...

I'll do the podium set -up: "mints";) = drug of the teacher's choice water glass - Can be clear ONLY if vodka, or Everclear is in it. Otherwise, it has to be a cup so that you can't see the drambuie or other dark liquor. Bible - well it only looks like a Bible. It's pages are really cut out and lined not only with notes but those "special photos" of the teacher's pet. It's okay, because the teacher is spiritual enough to handle it.

Perhaps it because you know a feeding frenzy is about to ensue... :biglaugh:

Principles of Motorcoach Maintenance

"DayPlanners! - The Godly Way to Organize Your Time and Leave No Room For the Devil"

The PROPER Way to Clean a Toilet - Getting all the Chit Out"

"More Than Words" - Extreme: The guitar and harmonies in this song are beautiful.

"Carefree Dooj" still has some semblance of self-respect.... ...that and I haven't had any of that hard-lemonade yet... :biglaugh:

So do you think we can get Rosie to serenade to us. We're supposed to be the apple of God's eye - We could sing this at the next ROAQueen - "Love of my Life" And YES I see the irony of the whole thing here.....

But ...but...but.... He's sooooo committed to change....to the Word.... <_< It's a shame he has to swim in a pool of rotten jeans...

So do you think the security cameras picked him up? I wonder if there's a mark on the door that's 1' off the ground.

I do my best to help around here ;)...I better go start breakfast.

I think we should start a new thread so that they know what the theme for October should be... Maybe if they read here ahead of time, they'll let us do all the work for them and next month's article might have some substance. I'm sure they feel WE are the ones that need to ask THEM for forgiveness. It's funny how all that reverse logic (ie stupidity) made sense when we were there at HQ. I wonder what they put in that familia anyway...

Well - I bet if I asked them to forgive me (not that I would, of course ;)) they'd want to check my bank account first....

Did your icon stop dancing? Or was that only the other Calvin?

Refresh... Does that mean to be fresh again?

This reads like a cheap tract... not the product of a "INTERNATIONAL research and teaching ministry." <_<

I need an "I" for Interesting...

Once a JW came to my door. Here's how that went: JW - Hello. Let me ask you, Are you a Christian? Dooj - Yes I am. JW - What denomination? Dooj - I am a Christian. I don't claim a denomination. JW - Well! That's a non-committal answer... Dooj - As far as I'm concerned, that's the ONLY answer. I believe in God and that Jesus Christ is His son. You're just asking me what brand I smoke. She left after that.