Ham

Maybe it is a gift.. I dunno.. the burning, or consumption that is. The box slowly grows back, but I know it really is not there.. its really not me.. fine. I need some kind of skin or something to clothe myself.. otherwise I will just sleep..

The main reason why most *believers* don't seriously question their faith.. maybe they can't. Maybe thinking outside of the box requires the box to be reduced to ash, if not only for a fraction of a second.. to echo the main theme of another nutcase similar to me.. actually, a wise teacher. Maybe there isn't any difference. "what would you do if you found that EVERYTHING you believed was just plain WRONG.."

why is it that these descriptions give me visions of a sexually incompetent self-aggrandizing dictator marching rapidly and erratically around his office.. sowy..

Oh Lord, won't you buy me..

Hey.. maybe I need a Mercedes Benz. Anybody here offer to chauffeur?

Well.. the Squirrel will not walk tonight. Found a sober driver..

even a drunk Squirrel knows better than to get behind the wheel.. I can WALK to the store to pick up another brew, can't I? If I'm so intoxicated that I can't friggin WALK to the store for another brewskie.. now maybe, just maybe, I don't NEED another brewskie? dumbass *evangelists* just can't seem to figure this out..

mean is one thing.. unbridled, and mean, is another..

Christ.. I actually consumed two bottle of the overweight rooster..

that's about it. Sowy, the Squirrel has been very bad..

Jeaua.. how ro you APPLY THE

Joni Mitchell is cool..''

We've got to back to.. what is it.. something.. Please forgive me.. I want more than is here..

kind of like a Nicotine withdraw.. it only lasts a few seconds.. just wait, be patient, it will go away..

what scares me.. well, maybe it doesn't. don't dare question, malign or otherwise what is the word.. can't think of it.. oh.. yes. don't incriminate gramps.. else you will be fiery confronted.. I am damned lucky here. I am just barely far enough out of the loop that any kind of threats hold no tangible significance.. no offshoot loyalty.. nothing. But I was.. Invited. Gramps invited me. along with a few hundred thousand others..

Hmm. Yeah.. well, perhaps. I recognize those familiar friends(?) from a few lifetimes back.. Just as mean and nasty then.. induct and send a Squirrel off to war, with impossible odds..

I wish it were me.. sometimes it rears its ugly head.. :) Well.. when it does, it does not last very long..

Yeah.. maybe it is the Big Gamble.. there is an accumulation of primitive thought here.. the Hindus acknowledge an entire being in the beginning.. some religions feel part of God died when this little universe came into existence.. maybe not died, more like fragmented. who do you think *we* are? does the Creator still hold all of the cards in the game.. I dunno.

I prefer to think.. God is not a set of training wheels.. I mean.. no matter what your belief.. didn't he give us individuality for some reason?

and some people wonder why I won't go to church.. well.. I'm not trying to slander familiar spirits or anything.. enchantments.. just seems to me.. raise enough hell and what do you accomplish.. or gain? Zero dialogue.

Then what.. the early sixties netted a few idealistic marks from Haight-Ashbury, San Francisco.. then what. How many "elders" from the fifties were put in the discard pile?

interesting.. people dealt and played like cards.. can't you just feel the love..

I think it is part of the process of assuming summary judgement over people's lives. vp's grandkid's justification was "well ham, we have to be able to keep the TROOPS in line.." same mentality.. I wonder how many scream-fests the followers have been subjected to so far..

This is the one tonight..