Leaderboard

December 1997: The ship was taking on water, lots of water......all the corps knew it. Money, money, money........ever since martindale's "full-time corps revelation" was implemented in August 1995 the trustees were scrambling to bail the water. Every month when I filled out those witnessing/sign-up reports.......there was 0, 1, 1, 0, 0,........dismal sign-ups for the wap-class. It was disturbing and depressing. Thankfully, my region guy wasn't hollering all that much at me......they had the same problem. I don't remember one positive outreach/class announcement highlighted that year during a sunday service. More than likely, we were teaching some aspect of JCOPS during this holiday season....trying to shake a shiny object in the malls....and attract others to take that shiny (bling, bling) new class. After my utter disappointment during Thanksgiving......the Advanced Class Special, my wife and I made sure to hug on our boys extra tight during Christmas and the holiday season. I'd giving enough of my time away from our boys and I wasn't about to be sitting at my desk at 8am for about 10 days.....while the boys were out of school. I know my wife felt the same, probably more so. Holiday time is for family. I was not going to be singing any twi-tweaked "holiday songs" either.....and I swore, if the trustees sent me a card.....it's going in the trash. .

merge Wierwille(not public version), Martindale, and Geer, suddenly you have Jim Jones, David Koresh, Dave Miscavege, each individually a bully, tyrant, and dictator

The funny thing is we look at that series on Scientology as therapeutic, enlightening, and helping our recovery. Can you surmise what things they are saying about it in the behind-closed-doors Pharisee meetings? "Oh, it must be inspired by seed of the serpent, behind the scenes. Leah Remini is possessed, being used by the debbil. And the sole purpose is to spin up blame for the ministry. She is inspiring all those people on GreaseSpot to tell stories, and they are debbil possessed too." How can I tell that's what they are doing? Because I used to think like that too while under the influence and authority of a cult. it wasn't until breaking the chains of that false authority that I started to develop a perspective that wasn't spiritual dumb@$$, and stopped being an overtly compliant tool leaving my brain as a dumping ground for whatever the current closest sycophant wanted to put in it.

The Dots Connect Back To Wierwille: Despite all the errors and blunders during this martindale phase (1989-98)*, the dots connect back to wierwille. To me, one of the glaring errors, among many, by wierwille was the institution of the corps as "the spiritual marine corps." Whatever that means. Wierwille set his corps on this spiritual plateau....and, unless you went thru the training program, you were never corps. This corps training bestowed upon you "spiritual elite empowerment and discernment." Without this training, you'd never rise to the level of spiritual acumen that God wanted for you. In other words, you HAD to go thru the training......the training, and diploma, was the master key that gave you access to walk throughout the house....mixing with the "master of the mansion, his children, staff hierarchy, and guests." Corps vs Non-corps......it was that definitive in wierwille's mind and world. Either you're corps or you're not! Corps marry corps, period. But........he softened that approach (which many say was the beginning of many corps problems) and allowed corps to marry non-corps AS LONG AS that corps grad was diligent in training up his/her spouse to the standard of corps. Yeah, there were special exceptions and all.....but wierwille wanted the corps blood uncontaminated by "lesser believers." Someone could write a thesis paper on this subject alone. During my in-residence year, the College Division was a strong element at the Emporia Campus. It was distinctively unique. Yet, there were demarcation lines that were NOT to be crossed. Corps meetings were corps meetings; no college division students were allowed. Fine......but at the lunch room, open functions, dances or just sitting on the grass....corps and college division should not be fraternizing? not enjoy being together? not "dating?" At the time, I really enjoyed being with Sonja.....our personalities, attraction to each other....just connected. But no......she was college division, and I was sternly told to not be spending my Saturday afternoons or open meetings sitting with her. Unequally-yoked, you know? It bugged me (still does!)......and, years later, I looked into the details of wierwille's life and discovered that he married a nurse when he, wierwille, was going thru seminary. Hypocrisy-look-in-the-mirror...........wierwille. Whether it was twi's "caste system....(yeah, I know it's not a true caste system where one is destined at birth with status, station in life).....or compartmentalizing the lock box stuff, (sexual predation -- wierwille and the secret agenda society).....and then, martindale's series of purges......the picture, by connecting dots, comes into view. Wierwille was a cult leader.......and martindale was following in his footsteps. Of course, many could say the same thing about all those splinter groups as well. In varying degrees, their "foundations, hierarchy, adulation, etc. is wierwille-esque. Each at various stages of growth and implementation, trying to erase any obvious lines to obscure the DNA lineage. *Note: This martindale era would be properly noted as 1989-2000, but since I exited in 1998....that's my perspective and, thus, timeline. .

More parallels - in Scientology there is always the promise of achieving a "higher level" if you just keep going, if you just spend more of your money for more classes and those sessions where you hold the cans and get interrogated. There is the highest level where you go Clear. For us it was also class after class until TaDa! The Advanced Class, the Holy Grail of spiritual enlightenment. And as it is in Scientology, once you get there it's not what it's cracked up to be but wait! There's another way to "grow spiritually". Go WOW. Even better go in the Corps! Then climb the ladder. Wow those ordained people must really be attuned spiritually. They must be walking by revelation all the time so if they tell me to do something it must be right even if I think it isn't because I'm at an inferior level. Like those levels in Scientology. Once you are Clear you are There. But once you get there it too is not all it's cracked up to be. And the money. The total disregard in both organization for the sacrifices being made to give and give at the expense of the members. An exScientology remarked that in the parking lot you could see the fancy cars and the beaters. The top echelon get the good ones and the run of mill underlings give and give and can't afford a decent car. And both organizations take the money and funnel it back into the organization and do nothing for those who give it for the purpose of the underlings (Joe Believer) is but to serve and give and give. Like in TWI we were told we would be "blessed" to serve. But where was this elusive "blessing" we were supposed to receive? Those at The Top sure seemed blessed. Surely God would bless us too if we just kept going and going. The former Scientologists in this series all shared that they reached a breaking point that it was IT and they did whatever it took to get out. Just as many of us did. When we knew that we never would get that carrot on a stick and we'd had it. One of the exScientoligists, upon being asked how much he had gotten over it all, said he sometimes went days without thinking about Scientology, Same here. But just as they say, it's never totally over. But they have gone on and reclaimed their lives as we have. Leah Remini left Scientology in 2013 and said some things about what she's going through and I could relate to that phase when you're making that transition, which to me is the first few years. Then you're living your life free of that cult and don't think of it for days.

I just want to say to you, Skyrider, that I am enjoying your posts immensely. Your recall is astounding and writing skills superb. Thanks for sharing all this. When I see your "name" on a post, I know it's going to be good. God's blessings to you.

I've been watching that Scientology series. I am totally fascinated. Parallel after parallel. Brings back memories of TWI. In the series a member was tasked by top dog David Miscavage to get all the sidewalks torn up so demonstrators wouldn't be able to get too close to their properties. Needless to say, member didn't accomplish this and was rebuked and physically assaulted by Miscavage. Reminded me of all that we were required to do per the directives of our "superiors" but never could measure up and were either subjected to rebuke or lived in fear of it. And of course there is the parallel of being ostracized if we committed some kind of what Scientology calls "crimes". The loss of our relationships that weren't TWI connected. They were unbelievers or Earthly family. In Scientology they are Suppressive Persons. The spying on and reporting of other members. Leah Remini shared how she had voiced some doubts to her closest of friends and they reported her and she was severely chastised and threatened. Brought back a memory of how I was asked by someone if I ever thought of leaving. I honestly told him well yes sometimes. Next thing I know here comes T L@lly branch leader asking me to see him the next day. I was so scared I couldn't sleep. The ensuing meeting was him yelling at me for at least an hour, a barrage of accusations some based on fact and others totally off the wall. But who was I to talk back or defend myself since he was The Man of God in the state. It reduced me to a blubbering pile of tears and then he came out from behind hid desk and hugged me. Talk about crazy-making! To this day I can recall this meeting and it hurt me for a long time. The person I am now would say Fu€k Off and walk out. .

Per the above directive, an appropriate gift would be one golf ball. Here ya go, Craig!

Exploring Creative Ideas: Thinking and doing the same things over and over again was insane. The monotony was killing me. The sizzle of anything exciting about twi had LONG disappeared. When I worked at hq.....I was always trying to live outside of my "nine dots" patterns. I worked on the wedding committee.....where six of us were tasked as wedding planners and facilitators, mediators between hq-clergy and couples prepping for their wedding day. From such locations like the Fine Arts and Historical Center in Sidney, OH, the BRC, or the campfire area in the way woods.....we made it happen. More storage space was needed for accounting/finances/legal departments......and the architects were in the planning/design stages of using the west end of the warehouse. They'd been studying those sliding-track systems to maximize storage and facilitate access to file cabinets behind file cabinets. The concrete floor needed to be torn up and steel tracks set in place to slide large cabinets back and forth. Anyways, I got wind of it and thought it was nuts! I went to my area coordinator, A.J....and told him how this would compromise that whole section from further use during special events. Many people just had no idea how vastly diversified that warehouse was used throughout the year. A multi-purpose warehouse....for a multi-purpose cult. So, I quickly studied up on mezzanine usage and sent my proposal to A.J. B3rreta and Howard Allen. The mezzanine would be installed over the shipping/receiving area and other offices....the high ceilings were empty space anyways. Next day, Howard sent back a short note to me thru interoffice mail......"Best idea I've seen on this." Later, I assisted Bob W1negarner and, by extension somewhat, Rosalie with all that High Country Caravan series. Yeah, a glorified "go-fer" I suppose...... but it added to something new, something outside my "warehousing department circle of thought and exposure." Running errands, watching rehearsals, stage cues, scene changes, ushering protocols......things to observe and explore. When Sound Out '84 came of age, I got to travel on the staff coach.....Bob & Rosalie did all the stage/emcee stuff and I was the designate "house manager at the grand ole opry" overseeing vip-seating, running errands front and back stage, anything to help assist Bob W. More memories are flooding my brain cells. Damn, maybe I shouldn't have opened the door to my repressed memory. .

September 1997: Peggy' death stung me deeply. I wrestled with this somber mood for weeks.....and no, I wasn't going to call my region leadership, the la1lys, to tell me to "renew my mind." I still resented bob moneyhand's intrusive counsel into how to handle Peggy's brother....and if that's the direction of this ministry, then count me out. I needed to be alone. I wanted to be alone. I thought about that verse where the apostles disengaged and said......"we go fishing." I went to a movie.....by myself. Titanic was playing in movie theaters across the nation with huge reviews. Sounded good.....bought the ticket, bought the popcorn, sat down. Little did I realize that powerful, emotional impact this movie would have on deep-seated, moving, questions: The fluke of winning access onto the Titanic thru a poker game (life is a series of luck and good fortune) In re-telling the story of Titanic.....elderly Rose (Kate Winslet) said she "could still smell the fresh paint" Upper class passengers and those below; steerage The bourbon and cigar meetings after meals / The rowdy partying and drinking below deck Jack lived a day-by-day drifting life / Rose was destined to live in a social order of dinner and tea parties The haughtiness of traveling at break-speed.....to get the headlines upon arrival in New York The strategic negligence to not have enough lifeboats for all passengers aboard Hitting the iceberg......and still refusing that the ship would NOT go down The song "My heart goes on"........Rose cherished those memories; Jack saved her from a life of conformity Rose throws "The Heart of the Sea" back into the water......only she would hold that secret I left the movie theater in deep ponder. I, too, could "still smell the fresh paint" of so many memories. A week later, I went again. .

The Book I Will Never Write: My goal is to finish this thread with personal experiences and insights of this martindale era. For years on GSC, I've "talked about a book I should write"........well, this is it. Hopefully, I've still got some material that will be of interest to many......and, if Pawtucket keeps the doors open here, who knows how many will come to read this timeline. Charlene did such a masterful job of writing Undertow......it covers all the pertinent deception and underbelly of cult control in the way international. Lots of depth and exposure to the "biblical research" elements. I plan to finish posting this timeline, because I said I would..........or die trying.

Tahu Vu Bahu (sp?) "Without form and void" <---- why talk so much about this and never give any good advice that is constructive? It amazes me he spent so much time seeking ways to shock minds. It amazes me more that followers seemingly craved new nonsense. How could a group constantly think evil and not see the results of their own behavior year after year, decade after decade? (that's meant rhetorically)

The Bribery Letter in the document file pinpoints a sampling of martindale's fury to the corps......but, I suspect, that he was SEETHING FOR MONTHS as to why his new class, that "grand undertaking and deeply personal measure of outpouring of self," was literally dead in the water. Stop and think about that "bribery letter" and its accusations..........then...........compare it to a portion of this "Gift Policy to Rev. Martindale" below: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The spiritual "big dog" eats well.............the field corps eats the scraps on the floor.