Leaderboard

I’m back in another country for a little while. My Corps notes and notes from all the classes I ever took are here. And also are letters from people I sponsored, who sponsored me, bless notes, etc etc etc. I’ve reread some of those letters. The pain in letters from SPs in the 1993-95 period is amazing. It’s class after class, after confrontation and reproof session…all about being better “in the word”, and so on. You know the story. There are letters from people I loved very deeply and many letters from someone I hoped for a future with. It didn’t happen. As so much didn’t. The pain came back as fresh and hurtfully as then. Oh, what we went through!!! I read some of the letters from these friends. I wept. I wept for the pain in their lives then, and in my life then, and for the missed opportunities and the broken hearts and the lives destroyed by leadership that didn’t or couldn’t care. By leadership that was misguided. By manipulation, sometimes. I wept for myself. For what I had wanted, and lost. For the plans I had, that were thwarted. I wept for the loving hearts of those who had cared and been deceived. I was reminded of the care and love we did once have for one another. For help that was genuinely given and received. What, one wonders, became of those people? May God bless them. And heal any remaining hurts or lingering pain. Without doubt I will have been a cause of pain to some. I am so sorry for that. There is a whole boxful of Corps notes and other such stuff. I am not even going to look at that. I don’t want to be reminded any more of it. This evening I am going to “burn the chaff.” The Corps notes and class notes will go. The letters from friends – letters of love and tenderness and genuine appreciation, as well as the reproof “you could do better” / “be more meek” type of letters, will all go. It'll be a good time. Maybe even with a glass or 3 of Merlot to help :). I hope to retain in my heart (and there alone) memories of good times, of genuine help and love given and received. I am thankful for the new song in my mouth, in my heart. Ps 40:3. God’s love never fails and keeps us even through the darkest places.

i want to know when donna martindale and rosalie rivenbark are going to stop living in sin and get married